Surgery was scary the way any surgery is- a bright, cold, sterile room full of nurses and doctors and tables and equipment, looking much like a science lab. I was nervous and excited and anxious and overwhelmed. It's quite strange walking into a room knowing that in about 30 minutes or less you'll have a baby. It's strange and wonderful! No matter how a baby is delivered, what a miracle! What a gift from God! Not to be sappy, but seriously!
After about 20 minutes of pushing and pulling and pressure on my abdomen they pulled our baby boy out if my stomach where he'd been residing for the past 9 months. I could feel the pressure of his weight on my ribs and stomach immediately go away as they worked him down toward the incision. And then I heard, "we have a boy! Big boy!" And all I could do was cry! It was the most surreal experience of my life!
It seemed like forever before I could even see him, let alone hold him. They finally brought him around the sheet so we could see him and I watched and cried as they cleaned him and handed him to Ryan for the first time and then Ryan held him above my chest and I just watched and cried! It's so indescribable the emotions you feel when you meet your baby for the first time. You kind of feel like you know them after having them camped out in your tummy for so long but finally you get to see them. It's so unreal! I think I was mostly crying years of joy and relief but some of them were tears for the fact that I was still waiting, still waiting to hold my baby for the first time. That, to me, was the hardest thing about having a c section!
They sewed me up and carted me to the recovery room where Ryan and Levi were already waiting for me and I got to hold him skin to skin on my chest for the first time and then I got to nurse him!
And now, long story short, he's here, our little 10 day old boy, sleeping in the other room, and we couldn't love him any more.
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